Sal's Reflections

When the Ebola phenomenon hit America the response was overwhelming and close to public panic . Masks were purchased by the thousands ,travel restrictions were imposed and government officials were vocal about the need to do whatever it takes to make sure the plague would not become rampant and out of control. There is another plague that has spread far worse in our land than Ebola. It strikes in schools and takes the lives of young children. It finds its way to movies,malls ,churches and Television interviews. It strikes with alarming frequency, and yet unlike the overwhelming response to Ebola the public and the government shrug their shoulders,decry the horror but literally do nothing until the plague strikes again. The plague is gun violence and we have it seems accepted it as part of the fabric of American life.
There is no vaccine that can prevent this, but being impotent because of the complexity of the plague is sheer madness. There are so many issues like mental health,a real dialogue on guns and more societal awareness on those who pose a danger to themselves and others.Some of these factors can not be easily solved, and the magic bullet does not exist but we cannot continue to ignore the reality that we are all vulnerable even in places that seemed beyond personal tragedy.

Every life has a certain amount of regrets but some wishes are still available. Going back to school ,or learning a new skill ,or taking language lessons and a host of other opportunities need not be relegated forever to the regret bin because of age.Some may be lost due to the fact that they were a once in a lifetime deal, but so many others are still there, Instead of wasting energy and feeling badly about them maybe it is time to move from regret to action.I had regrets as a college journalism major that I had not written much during the bulk of my life but one day I decided that age and circumstances would no longer stand in the way of my writing. I put my body on the chair, set that goal to write a novel and moved forward. My regrets have vanished, and I have three new writing projects rather than the sorry reflections of yesteryear.

The last few days on Wall Street have created a wave of anxiety for many of us.The hits keep coming, and we fear the dreaded scenario that it will continue and we will lose our security .It is certainly reasonable to be concerned, but this is not the first or the last time that Wall Street will be on a roller coaster, Remember the looming scenario in 2007 when we saw the market in free fall. Many believed that we were headed for another great Depression.We survived that, and despite a painful recession the market soared to new heights. Despite the black cloud forecasts of many pundits the sky did not fall ,and I believe that we will once again survive this major bump in the road.

I get a kick out of the quizzes on Facebook that allow me to find out which character I am on Downton Abbey,or which Super Hero I would be in a movie. It is a real hoot to use my imagination and wonder what it would be like to play one of those roles. However,there is a role and real life character that is singularly mine, and no other can ever fill that role. That role is unique and has never been played before, and will never be played again.It is based solely on my life, and I am the writer,the director-producer and prime actor. This is true of you and everyone else, so instead of our imitating others and imagining that we are someone else it is worthwhile to see the uniqueness of our lives.You and I are one of a kind, and in that sense we are priceless.Our worth can not be measured by comparison to others, and so we have the opportunity to write ,direct and act out our lives with a sense of joy and meaning.

I learned from my mentor Dave Collins that questions are powerful tools. They can open our minds to possibilities and alternative choices.. They can also also be the negative blocks that reinforce faulty images and limit our choices. The key is to choose our questions well.

If we ask the wrong questions our brain will automatically spew out answers that support the question. Our brains go to work, serving up answers that support the beliefs and assumptions we already have. For example, if you ask “ Why do I never get an opportunity to lead in this organization? Your brain will offer choices like:

• You’re inexperienced.
• You’re not talented enough.
• You’re too lay back
• Your too pushy
• Your verbal skills are limited
• Your position locked
• Your projects are relatively unimportant

Your brain will find answers to your beliefs and assumptions

However if you ask a different question you will get different results.

• What could I do to enhance my leadership skills?
• What are the two or three behaviors that will indicate my skills?
• How can I find leadership opportunities in my present position?

• How can I find a mentor that will assist me and help me grow?

Ask better questions and you will be amazed at the results they will provide.

Whenever we are dealing with a significant choice of action it is more than helpful to define as clearly as possible what he end result would be. For example, I see myself having many opportunities to deliver keynotes ,coaching and organizational consultations this year.I need then to ask myself” why is this important to me?”My first response is that I love this kind of involvement with others.Why is that important?Well it will help me to be engaged with many persons at every level.Why is that important? Because it will hopefully be of benefit to others.Why is that important for you? Because to have others experience a deeper sense of their value and ability to contribute is what drives me.
The more you ask yourself “why” this is important to you the more energy and inspiration you will gather. It allows you to go deeper and see with clarity what the end result looks like.

First win for the clearing house thanks to your emails and posts. A friend wrote to me last week explaining her concerns that she had been overlooked for promotion despite outstanding performance appraisals. She had been passed over three times and could not fathom why she had not received one of those promotions.. She and the rest of the organization were dismayed by what they perceived to be a process based on gender not talent. Through your counsel she arranged a meeting with her immediate VP and requested a pathway to being a candidate for the executive level. She presented her case with data and was pleasantly surprised by his response. He admitted that she was an outstanding g employee and felt that to some degree he had taken her performance for granted. They together established a series of new projects that would give her visibility, and he told her that he would support her for the next available position at the executive level. She requested that I thank all who sent me emails and posts.