Sal's Reflections

Prejudice and exclusion of others always has a rationale .Bias finds a group of myths to justify the behavior that harms innocent persons. Jews were blamed for every misfortune in Europe.Blacks were labeled as inferior people and the separation of the races was to protect the white race from pollution. Homosexuals were defined as abnormal and acceptance of their lifestyle would threaten the state of marriage between a man and a woman.Mexicans and Hispanics were publicly branded as rapists and freeloaders. Muslims bore the stigma of Islamic terrorists.
The latest group in the box of exclusion and bias are transgender persons. Again we find bogus data to justify a a blanket rationale to deny them ordinary citizen rights. The old myths are rolled out and there are even economic fables added to the traditional false rationales.The tragedy in this case is that the venom comes from the highest office in the land . While pardoning one that has racially profiled literally generations of Hispanics the president with his pen excludes those that have done no wrong. Their sin is their difference and that justifies his heinous exclusion of them from the military.The arguments are as bogus as any other group that has been harmed by prejudice and it is time for us to stop looking the other way. If hatred or bias hurts anyone it hurts us all.

I have spent decades studying the roots of the Holocaust and have had the privilege of knowing Viktor Frankl and many survivors.In all those years I have never used the word Nazi to describe a politician or any other citizen. What I witnessed today in Charlotsville ends that silence for me.Knowing first hand what the Nazi’s did to millions cannot be forgotten and listening today to the hatred of those neo -Nazis and white supremacists exploded a memory in my brain. Frankl told me in the beginning the marches in the street and anti- verbal Jew speech did not seem that it would last. We now know that those marches and words led to horrific acts of violence.

Members of the congress that are unduly influenced by lobbies or pressure will not be remembered years from now.There is no legacy in merely making sure you get reelected. History will take no note of the rank and file that spent years promoting self interest. However,those that have the commitment and courage to really represent the will of the people will be revered and remembered. Those who stand up against lies and power grabs that take away the rights of the citizens are those who years from now will be honored. We face mighty challenges in this political culture that stokes anger and partisan protection.Hopefully some have the guts to reach across the aisle and act like states persons. The opportunity for greatness is there as well as the the temptation to be one of the greedy sheep.I see some cracks in the “let’s go along” mentality and hope the whole wall of ignoring the will of the people crumbles.

In February 1912 eleven year old Salvatore Tagliareni came to America from Cammarata,Sicily. He did not speak a word of English but wept when he saw the statue of Liberty.Prejudice was rampant at that time and so school was not available to him. He worked six days a week in a sweat shop. He was covered with dust,debris and never complained because this land held so much promise. This man and his brothers in the 1920’s owned the second largest laundry in New Jersey. They worked tirelessly to build a meaningful life for their families.They loved this country with a passion and their sons literally shed blood on foreign lands.This was the America that cradled them and they paid her back with building communities that were the envy of the world
.
Today I heard words from the White House Press room that were so far from the values of what has made us great. I heard a spokesman demean the legacy on that statue in the harbor and a policy on immigration that makes no sense ,morally, economically and is an aberration to our most cherished values.Sorry Mr.Miller you and Bannon can fool some of the people all of the time, but the bulk of those who are the progeny of those that could not speak English will fight you tooth and nail on this policy.

Reaction of editor friend to my first draft.

On the Corner: A Novel of Lifelong Friendship

S.J. Tagliareni

On the Corner braids the stories of two men who first bonded as New Jersey school boys in the 1950s and reconnected 60 years later to heal their friendship and themselves. Michael is a compassionate but by-the-books doctor, depending on science, faith, and conservative politics to navigate the world’s complexity. Sal is a radical and passionate seeker who started his journey as a priest, but left the church to explore after an encounter with psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, Viktor Frankl. When they meet again in the upscale, but deadly dull Fox Hill retirement community, they bridge their differences to spark surprising new beginnings, even at the end of life.

This is a novel about ordinary men who lived extraordinary lives, confronted by social transformation in a convulsive moment in American history, navigating personal tragedy and claiming different visions of service, success and faith. Their friendship challenges each of them to lighten up, truth up, and man up to face their fears, healing old wounds and reviving their dreams. With humorous insight into men’s friendships and feelings, this story speaks to today’s political and social divide, proving that no matter how stuck we might seem, we can change and grow at any age.

How can anyone be surprised at the venom toward women that this childish shell of a real man spews.?Our children need role models that lead them to see and respect the value of all women. Not only women must stand against this ,but also every man that understands the harm that his behavior causes Those in power look the other way and make excuses for this man who every day diminishes the image of his office. They do it because shared power means more to them than decency.

Trump has an unending history of publicly saying things about women that are horrible..I for one will never accept this treatment of any woman, and will lend my small voice to those that have the decency and courage to openly oppose his vile views.

Many of us were very fortunate to have wonderful fathers in our lives, but there were also many other male role models along the way. These men were not technically our fathers but they taught us many life lessons by the way they lived. Some were family members while others were teachers and coaches.They taught us lessons like respect for others regardless of their color,creed or beliefs. They helped us understand the value of seeing persons as individuals who deserve our respect and care.They protected those that were easily vulnerable to bullying .They cherished the children that had handicapping conditions and dedicated their lives to helping them feel valued.The lessons of these men deserve to be praised on a day that we honor our fathers.

A friend asked if I could meet with his nephew who had some serious concerns about becoming a father. The young man shared with me that his father had been physically abusive to his mother and the children for years. He told me that he knew almost nothing about being a loving father and feared that he might replicate his father’s behavior. After he finished speaking about his worries I told him that his awareness was a major step in his not duplicating his history. We also chatted about the value of positive role models that could assist him in this new and awesome responsibility.
As we chatted I was reminded of the profound models that influenced my knowledge of what it meant to be a nurturing and loving father. My father,father in law and older brother were all outstanding fathers and just watching all the love and care they heaped on their children molded my path to fatherhood. It is an awesome responsibility to be a father but a joy that is beyond description. I have been blessed with those that taught me, and the two wonderful children that life has put in my care.