Sal's Reflections

I am aware that in many respects I have lived a blessed life. I have always had a roof over my head and have never been truly hungry. Blessed with so many people that have loved me and have been showered with the blessing of priceless friendships.Couple this with educational and vocational opportunities that I could not have imagined as a child. All this is not the story of many others lives who daily struggle just to exist so there is a responsibility to do all I can to enable others to share in the blessings of life.There is no dearth of opportunities, and each day I must remind myself that “one who is given much has the need to give back to others.”

It appears that all systems are go and “On the Corner”will be published in early July.I have already had book club invites from California and Dallas and will be available in person or by Zoom for many areas of the country. Also, will continue the presentations on the Holocaust and Roving Leaderships so please keep me in mind for speaking opportunities. Soon we will launch a new website which will combine the current ones and is much more interactive in its support of all the speaking and writing.

Tomorrow will be the fifth anniversary of the Boston Marathon bombing and life has been permanently altered for hundreds of innocent people.Some families lost loved ones, while others have endured years of pain,surgeries and loss of limbs.That hateful day shattered hopes and dreams ,but the terrorists in their warped hatred believed that they would overwhelm the population and force Bostonians into a cowering future. They had no sense of the deep heroic roots of a city that was at the birth of he American dream. Certainly there was fear and trepidation but the words”Boston Strong” were more than a slogan.The city wept ,but those tears were not ones of a defeated citizenry; they were the evidence of sadness but also the resolve to get through the pain and live fully despite the pain. Tomorrow the myriad of persons that compose this wonderful city will come together again to celebrate the marathon. There will be silence in remembrance ,but also the exuberant cheers of a people that will never be cowed by evil.

It is always a temptation in any sort of disagreement to muster all the evidence on my side and attempt to win. Once this happens I shut down the possibility of listening and trying to understand the perceptions of the other side. I am hearing words ,but in fact not listening because I am mustering my facts in order to respond.Civility often drops into the background and my responses may drift into the personal rather than the factual. Winning is certainly something that carries with it some benefits but at what cost?Truly engaging in a respectful dialogue without labels can often lead to a place beyond the initial discord.It is certainly worthwhile to have strong convictions and values but trying to get at mutual understanding far outweighs the temporary robust feelings of winning.

I have always loved Stephen Hawking’s words “Look at the stars instead of your toes”.No one had more reasons to fold up, sit in a corner and feel sorry for himself. A brilliant life ahead of him and he was struck with a terminal disease that left little hope for a meaningful life. He lived a life way beyond the predictions and gave many with similar challenges hope that their lives despite the difficulties could have great meaning.
We all can look at our toes and think that things are not going the way we had envisioned our lives but there is available that moment today to look at the stars. Our path is singular and connected to others .We can sense the beauty and wonder of our journey. This morning I draw strength from Stephen, and in my search for the stars will find new energy and inspiration.

I am saddened by the legislators that continue to make the lives of our gay brothers and sisters more difficult. They continue to place pejorative labels on gay marriage and in some states they have made it almost impossible for a gay couple to adopt a child. I am led to believe that this comes primarily from a lack of contact and experience. I am sure they have never seen a parent in a gay relationship spend the entire night caring for a sick child.The day to day contact and joys of every couple ,be they straight or gay, have the same experiences. They pay the mortgage, go to soccer games, cut the lawn, shovel the snow and attempt to live out the dreams of their family.I know gay couples who are not only wonderful persons ;they are also outstanding parents. Despite the labels, the lack of compassion toward them they go on with their lives and have enhanced my life with their friendship. It is well past the time when we shoulder to shoulder with them rid the country of draconian laws and labels that hurt them.

I never for one moment growing up feared that my Father would physically harm my mother,sister,brother or myself.However,early on I realized that this comfort was not shared by all of the children in my neighborhood. It was common knowledge that one father ,who was frequently drunk, regularly abused his family physically and emotionally. There was little interference by anyone, and literally no person or institution that could offer them any respite or hope.It is easy to judge someone who is being physically abused with the simple belief that they should remove themselves from the abuser. Sounds good but it is rarely that easy.It is way beyond the time when those of us who have had the luxury of a warm safe environment to stand up for those who cower in their homes. It makes no difference whether the abuser retains a lofty corporate or government position. They must be called out and those being abused protected from further harm.