Sal's Reflections

Today is the 48th anniversary of Jack Murphy’s death.I was in Rome at the graduate house of studies when I received the devastating news that he had died in an auto accident. The grief of that day lasted for a long period of time but has been replaced by deep gratitude.”Murph: was a singular blessing that to this day puts a smile on my face and a warm feeling in my heart.I have been so fortunate to have a series of “best fiends” and he was at the top of that list. His life was short but oh so powerful, and the impact he had on the lives of others still lives.Knowing him has made me want to be a better person, and I have shared him in every presentation that I give since his death.

For one shining moment it appeared that I would soon have my license in hand. I had passed the eye test and the last hurdle was merely to have my photo taken but then it happened. The clerk in reviewing the six thousand documents found that the report from the Washington DVM was passed the 30 day limit. Her Sound of Music face turned into a frown and she said “sorry but you have to get a new report”. Those words almost forced me into a catatonic state. Dealing with the Washington DVM is tantamount to swimming in shark infested waters with a Big Mac in your mouth. I asked to see a supervisor. Mr.McDonald was summoned and I immediately told him my favorite musical was Brigadoon and I have six recordings of bag pipe favorites that I play daily. He in a scornful voice said”I hate musicals and the bagpipes make me nausceous.”I then began to hum the theme of the Godfather and asked him if he had a horse. Hoping the bloody image would cause him to make an exception but again there was no change. I then resorted to the old Jersey City favorite by dropping a twenty dollar bill on the floor and asking if it was his.The bureaucrat smiled and gave his final “no” while carving another notch on his belt.I with stooped shoulders left and know that the next six weeks will be spent trying to get the Washington DVM to respond to my begging.

I believe that if you had fifty thousand persons in a stadium and asked the following questions we would have a genuine understanding of the importance of pre-existing conditions. Please stand up if the answer is yes to any of the following: Who has a relative or personally has been diagnosed for any form of cancer?Do you know anyone that has a cardiac issue or has high blood pressure?. Is there in your family or social circle persons that have type 1 or type 2 Diabetes? How about Lupus,respiratory illness,reflux.autism ,autoimmune deficiencies? By the time you finished identifying the pre-existing conditions that the present administration is seeking to exclude the entire audience would be standing.
A recent article in USA today regarding the administration’s views on pre-existing conditions is filled with lies and misleading statements. This is an issue that touches EVERY American so please be aware of candidates positions on this issue.

Received this email from an unknown reader of “On the Corner”
“I don’t know you but your beautiful book has touched me beyond words. Reading it was like taking a lifetime trip with your two marvelous characters.

It reinforced my belief that there is no such thing as an ordinary life. Michael and Sal lived extraordinary lives and their call to serve others is so needed today.I hope that you will create a new novel but in the meantime I will reread this one more than once. Also I am aware that you have other novels so I am going to fire up the Kindle this evening.

Many times when people are on vacation dreams about new opportunities in life seem to naturally visit their brains and hearts. This rings especially true while lying on a beach looking at the water.However ,it frequently happens that those dreams end as soon as the vacation comes to a close. The myriad daily responsibilities come charging back in and label the dreams as frivolous and even irresponsible. Dreams don’t belong only at the beach ,or while you are on vacation. They are often the precious goals that are attainable, and you don’t always have to be one who settles for the now. At least occasionally give yourself permission to surface the vacation “wish list ‘and explore whether the few precious goals are within reach. Life gets more zesty when you have a few magnets that enhance purpose and meaning.

In the midst of all the shouting and rationales regarding the Supreme Court nominee one fact can get easily lost.The abuse of women sexually has been and still is a serious issue.The need to change the culture regarding this challenge is as great today as ever. Part of the solution is for the witness to come from men as well as women. This is not just a problem for women. The way we as men behave will ultimately be the root of practices that harm or help women. This is not about male bashing or being politically correct. It is more the focus on the need to create a culture where safety and respect, regardless of gender, are foremost in practice as well as theory.It is late in the game, but never too late to stand with all of our sisters so they may feel safe and respected every place they venture.

Part of the joy of writing the novel “On the Corner” was actually reliving some of my most memorable experiences.People became alive again and I could actually feel their presence. I relived the joys and pains of the journey and at times the little boy from Delaware Avenue was once again involved in frivolous activities.The fiction parts were easily written because so much of the core had actually been experienced.I ,on so many occasions ,would actually get lost in thought while writing and was transported to places like Westbury,Jersey City and California.Book clubs keep the ride alive, and I look forward to doing as many as possible.

Giving a major presentation on my novel”On the Corner” this evening.The points that I will make are :

1.On the Corner is a metaphor for community. A place where one belongs and like Cheers everyone knows your name.
2.Michael and Sal encounter doubts early on as to what they should do with their lives.
3.These ordinary men lead extraordinary lives
4.Major losses happen in every life but the reaction to those losses define a person.
5.One person negotiates life by Religion and the other by spirituality. Both have genuine value.
6.Friendship is a gift that can last for one’s entire life.
7. Diverse views on life and politics need not sever friendships.
8. Every age needs purpose and meaning.
9.Men tease each other as signs of their love
10.Friendships allow the little child within us to live and thrive.
11. Service to others is the path to happiness.

I literally can’t count the number of persons who have inspired me along the way. One of the most powerful lessons they taught me is to love what you do. I don’t always when I open my eyes leap out of bed with energy and enthusiasm. However, as soon as I wash my face I realize that I still love what I do. I love teaching,writing,coaching and trying to pass on all that my mentors and life have taught me. Blessed with insatiable curiosity ,every day I learn at least one significant thing that allows me to grow. My advice to all who will listen is, at least part of the time, do something you love. It will allow you to realize that every second is a blessing and will lead you to model for others the path to real meaning.