Conflict unresolved

“What is the most difficult part for you?”

“I just don’t get how the hell it happened. We raised him the same as the other kids.”

Did you ever discuss how you feel with him?”

“Discuss is the wrong word. Every attempt leads to the same result. I lose my cool and he clams up. The kid does not believe in rules. You would love him because he’s so God damn liberal.’

“No rules?”

He thinks the Church is bullshit, and totally rejects the Church’s position on homosexuality. I tried to get him to talk to a priest friend of mine and he comes back with “Dad do you know how many Catholic priests are gay?”

“Where was Arlene when all of this was going on?”

“She tried many times to bring us together especially when she was dying. I think that both of us loved her so much that we put our best foot forward in front of her, but it didn’t last. Even at the funeral we somewhat avoided each other. It has completely gone downhill since then.”

“What do you think you can do about the situation now?”

“I don’t know how to fix it.”

“Fix it?”

: Yeah fix it. I want the magic wand that will make him straight I’m sure you think that’s awful.”

“Mike I have no right to think that your feelings are awful, but I come at it differently than you. I don’t want to get into a whole religious political argument with you.”

“Tell me what you think. I won’t lose my cool.”
“I don’t think being gay is wrong,”

“But it’s unnatural.”

“Who decides that?”
: “The Church for one and every civilization in history.”

“Mike it has been a reality for thousands of years.”

“So has murder but that does not make it right.”

“What’s so wrong about two people loving each other?”
“It’s against nature and is morally wrong.”

“I don’t buy the unnatural argument. People don’t love each other based solely on gender.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means that gay people don’t have any more choice than straight people. I’m not straight because I’m better; it’s just the way I’m wired.”

“Maybe you believe that because you can accept anything.”

“The fundamental difference between us Mike is that I don’t believe that being gay is immoral.”

“Sal gays are so promiscuous.”

: “Mike I know straight guys that would fuck a snake if you held it still.”

But Sal the Church has been and is my anchor. How do I throw the teaching overboard?”

“ I don’t think you throw it overboard, but I know that you love your son ,and that has to be the most important ingredient in all of this.”
“It’s not a question of love. It’s a question of right and wrong.”

“I don’t buy that Mike—it’s deeper than that. It’s a question of love overcoming difference.”
: “I love him but can’t accept his lifestyle,”

“Is that going to change him?”

“No but why should I be the one to change?”

“Is being away from him working for you?”


“Then what are your choices?”

: “I don’t have any.”


“I’m not sure.”

“Mike we are not getting any younger, and this is a time when we need to look at what is really important to us before we go.”

“This is so fucking hard:”

“I can only imagine.”

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