Sal's Reflections

In my neighborhood when I was twelve years old I was slightly aware that one of my friend’s father was an abusive man. There were times when my friend would have cuts on his face and his mother always wore sun glasses even in the house. There was a tension in his home that was palpable but we never spoke about his situation. Silence was the order of the day, and what happened in families behind closed doors was thought to be nobody else’s business. Fortunately I am no longer a boy, and violence toward children and women needs me as a man to stand with all those courageous female leaders who have brought these dirty secrets into the light. As a man silence is no longer an option, and it is imperative that we not see domestic violence as a women’s issue. It is a human issue and adult men must stand up and publicly condemn it.

I have literally in my life given thousands of public speaking engagements. Despite this reality there is always that moment of self doubt before the presentation begins. That little voice at the back of my brain says”is this the time you are going to bomb?That moment of self doubt is natural ,and exists in most life experiences. However, in my case it has always passed and to have self doubt is most natural. The only negative is when the self doubt takes over and makes what we seek and desire unattainable. That voice that is most times purely negative is also the voice of opportunity if you pass through it.

In the midst of the concerns about the Veterans Administration it is important to note that this is a leadership, management issue not a condemnation of the service providers. The dedication of the nurses and staff has been the backbone of this organization for decades. I know first hand that the services provided by these professionals are more than just meeting the physical needs of our veterans. They are the ones who deal with the horrors of war first hand, and day in day out show up to embrace and care for those who are maimed in body and soul. Our thanks first and foremost should be to those that made the sacrifices in our name but also to those who are there for them each day.

I was very involved in the anti-war movements in the Vietnam and Iraq wars. However. I never lost sight of the bravery and heroism of all those who served in our armed services. It was not they who decided to go to war, yet they willingly faced the horrors of war and endured all sorts of hardships . Unfortunately, especially in the Vietnam era, they returned to all sorts of recriminations, and were castigated and neglected. We must honor their commitment and give more than lip service to the multiple needs that their service has created. Our veterans deserve the concrete assistance that they have earned, and each of us must support them as they return to civilian life.

I had the good fortune to speak with Cevin Byerman the publisher of the prestigious magazine” Publishers Weekly” at an event in Dallas.We chatted about the tasks facing authors today and he shared some of his experience.”First the book must have a message and the author must have a passion for the work. Couple that with the absolute need to be discovered and the ultimate goal will be reached,” He added” it is critical that everyone that knows the author participate in establishing the “Buzz”” especially through social media.”I completely understand this, and believe I have a message, the passion and with your help the discovery will be achieved

As a writer you often play with a variety of plots and character developments. The story unfolds in the conscious and subconscious reflections and to a certain degree you have control of the outcome. Each person is similar to a novel because they have a unique story. There is benefit in examining that story and realizing that it can have different outcomes. Like the characters in fiction there is the opportunity to change, develop , reach new destinies and create plot lines that have deeper meaning. Your story is one of a kind, and you are not only the main character, you are the writer and editor. It is worth the opportunity to review the dialogue,the plots and above all the intent and conclusions to your story.

I believe there is a force in life that I will call “the law of attraction”. No one can control every circumstance but there are certain magnets that attract choices. If the disposition of a person is predominantly negative then many of the choices and opportunities that come into play are negative. Not Pollyanish to believe that the opposite is also true. If the expectations are on the plus side, then one becomes aware of the myriad positive opportunities that exist. We tend to attract what we believe is possible.

Received a moving email from a person who heard me speak months ago at the Liberty Museum” In the email a woman who had lost many relatives in the Poland period of the Holocaust, some died at Auschwitz while others were murdered in their villages,she wrote “I was very moved by your presentation and decided that night to purchase your book. I am so grateful that a Gentile has made it his life’s work to remember our loved ones. In the name of my Grandparents and other 14 members of my family who died I wish you the peace that your dedicated heart will bring you.”

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Early on every person makes a key decision about who they are, and this effects the choices they make. That first decision is largely shaped by others because at that moment adults have such overwhelming effect on who we are. However, that decision should not be made in stone because circumstances and people change. If the initial decision is positive and allows room to grow and develop at every level then it is healthy and should be reinforced. However, if it is primarily negative and limiting it should be dusted off, reviewed and changed. No one should be totally defined by their past and the views of others.

Attended a concert last night at the Kennedy Center with a neighbor who is almost completely blind but despite this fact never misses an opportunity to experience the beauty of music. She related that losing one sense has made her so much more appreciative of the other gifts and experiences of life.When she received the final diagnosis that her sight would be lost forever there were choices to be made and she chose to take the high road. The opportunity to live her live fully is never met with” I can’t do that because I am almost completely blind.”I emotionally feed off this kind of person ,and hope that no matter what happens I will be able to continue to savor the wonder and opportunities that are all around me.