Sal's Reflections

When I was five years old my father took me to Ebbets Field to see the Cardinals play the Dodgers. The star of the Cardinals was Stanley Frank Musial dubbed “The Man” by the Brooklyn fans because he was a great player. After the game we waited and took the subway back to Manhattan with the players and I sat on Stan Musial’s lap. He was ever so kind and playful and from that moment he became my idol. One of the greatest players ever to wear a uniform, he was also a great human being. Stan died yesterday, and he will be missed not only in St. Louis but by all of us who had the privilege of seeing this hall of famer live such an exemplary life. I will never forget him.

Literally thousands of times in my life I have said things like” I am starving or I am so hungry I could eat a horse”.. In fact, despite these phrases, I have never in my entire life known true hunger. Millions of Americans, often children, experience the pain and suffering of true hunger every day. In a land with such abundance there is no valid reason why this should be a reality. Real hunger kills not only the body but also the spirit, and even though many of these children are unseen by us ,they are our responsibility. I must ask myself where is my voice in the face of this suffering? It is not enough for me to feel empathy. I must find small ways to change the plight of so many who literally live meal to meal.

There is more shouting and name calling in public discourse every day. Labels are thrown about and public officials seem to have lost the ability to dialogue. However there is hope in the most recent polls about guns, the debt ceiling and immigration. Americans ,by and large, are tired of the petty squabbling and want action in the key challenges that face the nation. The growing positive dissatisfaction with the status quo within the beltway gives me hope that in the coming year our elected officials will learn to lead and govern.

The attempts by Governor Cuomo and the President will not totally solve the issue of gun violence but they are a start. There are reasonable steps that must be tried and no one that is fair minded believes that the 2nd amendment will be abrogated. This multi layered issue will not be solved by the fringes on both sides of the argument, but rather by those in the middle willing to realize that there are no perfect quick fixes. Every one of us needs to be involved in this dialogue, not for a few months but for as long as it takes. Nine hundred more dead since Newtown tells us that our resolve must not wane because it is difficult to find answers.

Too often there is little dialogue in our personal and political discussions because we are focused on the next thing we are going to say. Real change occurs when we listen to the other person with an open mind. There is always a kernel of value and truth in every perspective, but if we shut down the possibility of hearing that we operate on partial truths. Defense mechanisms may protect the wholeness of our argument, but they leave us with too often inaction and no solutions. Listening as fully as possible not only offers the possibility of common ground ,it also provides the other person with the respect that leads to deeper relationships and new opportunities for growth.

It has been one month since the tragedy in Newtown and yesterday many of the victim’s parents held a news conference. It was moving to hear that this group of parents despite their grief pledged to help protect all children in the future. Their appeal to all of us was not to continue to behave as we have in the past. They duly appreciated the national and international outpouring of sorrow but pleaded that we not end our commitment there.They requested that we stay the course and work on long term solutions so that no parent will have to experience their pain. They were clear that there is no simple fix,no one size fits all solution, but all of us can contribute some small sustained behavior that will make the difference.

One of the wonderful emotions in the human experience is Joy. I feel it at various times ,many of these are immediate and often unexpected. It happens when I have the pleasure of a dear friend’s company, or hear the wondrous sounds of a favorite opera. Family is often the source of this heart warming experience or the moments when my writing has become more vibrant. The moments in life are legion when we open our minds and hearts to the wonder that surrounds us. The pleasure of joy is often seconds away when we make ourselves vulnerable to the treasures of our ordinary days.

Since the Newtown tragedy there has been a great deal of finger pointing and very little self evaluation. Finding a villain may satisfy parochial views, but I believe it will do little to prevent the next tragedy. There is a bit of solution in each camp if only there would be more listening and less absolute positions. The only way it will work is for many of us who understand the complexity support those who are willing to look at every aspect with minimal bias. It would be well for all of us to remind ourselves of the horror of that day, and the pain that resides in that community. Iron clad postures may make some feel good but at the end of the day we will spin the wheels without moving forward

Forty years ago at a gay pride parade a school teacher who had a gay son marched with a sign.The sign implored parents of gay children to love them. That simple act by one person exploded into an avalanche by people in the parade who embraced Jeanne and allowed some of the parents to be openly supportive to their children. Since then that momentous occasion has led to hundreds of thousands of parents who today belong to an organization that loves and publicly supports the rights of those who are gay, lesbian or trans gender. The power of one, especially when it is motivated by love, can literally transform legions and allow them to stand up for the full rights of others. This marvelous woman has died at the age of 93 but her legacy will live forever.

Just came back from a fabulous lecture entitled” disruptive Innovation”. It was fascinating, based on new business models that radically change our world for the better while bringing down the cost of goods and services. It was particularly fascinating when the model was focused on the evolution of Health care in this country. There are new wonderful exciting ways of delivering health care services that will revolutionize the way we are all treated in the future. Already there are phenomenal attempts out there that are willing and able to be reproduced.