Sal's Reflections

Being verbal by nature I often speak without fear or hesitation on a host of issues. I love conversations and often relish in exploring complex issues with friends,associates and even total strangers. Through the years I have improved from enjoying the sound of my voice to stifling for periods my voice and consciously listening. The learning curve has risen dramatically and especially when I sincerely desire to listen. There is so much vital information stored in the minds and hearts of others that real growth comes from the willingness to at least temporarily suspend judgement and listen. Today I pledge to remind myself that I have one mouth but two ears.

I have spent the last week with my closest friends and the treasures of these days are priceless. There is a comfort level that strips away all the facades that like barnacles become part of our lives.The natural opportunities to be myself in their presence is such a gift. There have been hordes of laughs,profound conversations and the abiding realizations that life with friends is as good as it gets.

For years I have followed lists of actions to be taken each day. Most are related to goals that I have set for myself.In the past I would often do the easiest ones on the list and often procrastinate about the more difficult ones. In the past few years I have reversed the process and the results have been remarkably better. I now(at least most of the time0 address the most challenging at the beginning of the day when I have more energy and focus. The results have improved ,and much to my amazement the results and desired outcomes have measureably improved. Try doing the tough ones first because I believe you will discover that they become easier with practice and determination.

Everyday I follow the patterns of prior days often without a great deal of awareness. I shave in the same way beginning in the same spot ,and follow a host of daily rituals without giving most a second thought. The same could be said of behavioral patterns that have grown and become solidified through the years. Nothing wrong with this fact but it often prevents alternative choices. Altering consciously a pattern of behavior offers alternatives in which we may find new purpose and meaning.On the other side of altering the tried and the comfortable there is always something new to be learned and experienced. I love the expression that”Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”

If you were to find a vase in a thrift store and find out that it was incredibly unique and priceless because it was the only one in the world your heart would soar. You would not waste time comparing it to other vases, and would realize what an incredible treasure you had discovered.That vase is like you because you are one of a kind. No one in the history of the world has been exactly like you. There is no other version and in that sense you are priceless. And so my suggestion is stop the comparisons and the endless rumination of what you aren’t and focus on what you are. No one can touch the world in the same way you can, and the opportunities to share the priceless gift of yourself are endless.

A dear friend who has had many difficult experiences in her life once said to me”I have never had a good outcome by being negative.”I was stunned by her words because from an outside appearance it seemed life had been less than fair to her. On further reflection her words caused me to examine my own view on life.and i came to the same conclusion. There was no event or set of circumstances that were enhanced by my being negative.It is not a Pollyanna approach to approach every set of daily circumstances with a positive attitude. It may not be apparent initially but in the end things turn out better when the glass is half full.

I spent this morning in the pesence of a genius,Robert Schorr. He invited me to visit his apartment to view sixty years of his talented compositions. The depth of his work was overwhelming. His paintings were so fascinating and they were surrounded by scultures that belong in a museum. This eigthy eight year old genius is even more intriguing because he is remarkably humble. I feel so privileged to call him friend.

It is obvious to most people that there is not absolute control over everything in a person’s life. Each day brings suprises,some pleasant and some not so pleasant. There is no perfect formula for avoiding every challenge and trying to control every moment is not only fruitless but also debilitating. Howewver ,I learned at the feet of some incredibly wise people that you can control your response even to the most difficult circumstances. It isn;t easy and is not an instantaneous magic wand, but you can choose to respond to any issue in a productive way.

No matter how perfectly constructed your goals and plans are most times there are unforseen obstacles. It is most discouraging when circumstances beyond anticipation create substantial road blocks. It is at these moments when conviction to keep” right on trucking” ultimately makes the difference. Almost always when i accept the new challenges but reinforce the goal and the plan the desired outcome becomes possible. It is in the willingness to adapt,change and muster the necessary energy that all sorts of achievements are possible.To persevere is the path to success.